


Rolling in the Deep

by nocturneequuis



Category: One Piece
Genre: M/M, PWPish, alabasta sex is the best sex?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-01
Updated: 2013-02-01
Packaged: 2017-11-27 18:43:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/665220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nocturneequuis/pseuds/nocturneequuis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alabasta is a pretty uncomfortable place... but an unexpected proposition leads Zoro to get carried away by Ace's ambition. No normal man can fight the Will of D.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rolling in the Deep

 

               There was nothing pleasant about Alabasta. By day, the sun scorched everything, beating down mercilessly from above and below as it baked the sand in shimmering waves of heat. At night, all that heat was gone sucked into the endless starry sky because the sun wasn’t there to hold it down. Zoro chafed his arms and shivered, thinking about dropping his pride and wrapping a blanket around his shoulders. The cold was the bitter, still kind that sunk straight through his skin and into his bones.

                The others were wrapped up, cocooned in sleep. Luffy and Usopp were sharing the warmth of Chopper’s fur, in a tangle of blankets before the low fire. Nami and Vivi were sequestered in what Usopp had named the ‘tent that had survived’. Zoro wasn’t sure what was behind the name as Usopp refused to say—but he had a feeling it had something to do with Luffy and the crazy cactus water he’d been finding despite their best efforts. Sanji had fallen asleep propped up against Caroo, similarly covered with a blanket and they were both far gone. Blond hair rested against yellow feathers and it was hard to tell the difference between man and duck. Zoro grinned at the thought and reminded himself to bring it up again later.  There were only two bedrolls unused right now, still rolled up and stowed by the fireside, his own and one other.

               Zoro yawned, wiping away the wet that came to his eyes, and made his way across the campsite toward the tall rock outcropping they were backed against. It stuck up out of the sand, curved in at one side and sloping out at the other. Vivi had called it a sail rock but Zoro thought it looked more like a shark fin, jutting out of a sea of sand. He glanced up to where Fire-fist Ace was sitting on a small ledge near the pinnacle of the rock, one leg tucked close to his chest as he looked out over the dunes. Odd sort of guy. Strong sort of guy considering what Zoro had seen, not to mention heard. The adventures of a Whitebeard pirate traveled far.

               He moved closer to the rock and even though he hadn’t made a sound, not even a hiss of sand, he suddenly found himself under a piercing black gaze that missed nothing. He couldn’t help but feel the impact of that look like a small hit to the center of his chest and grinned. Dangerous kind of guy, too. He couldn’t help but admire it. He raised a hand in greeting and Ace finally seemed to recognize him because he grinned, teeth flashing white like a small moon, and raised a hand back. Then jumped down, landing in a crouch on the sand before straightening and dusting off his black robes.

               “Yo, Zoro,” he said with that same wild grin. “You looked pretty scary down there.” He sounded like he was teasing but Zoro didn’t get the sense that the other man was mocking him.

               “Sorry, didn’t mean to sneak up on you.”

               “Nah,” Ace said, clapping him on the shoulder. “I’m just not used to company these days. So, what brings you out here to this side of the rock? Couldn’t sleep?”

               “I’m on watch.”

                Ace nodded. “Nothing much out here to watch. Just a lot of desert.” Ace looked out over the sand again, washed bone white with the thin slice of gleaming moon. A faint wind rippled snake like over a distant dune and above it the stars blazed without mercy.

               “It’s nice though,” Ace added after a moment.

               “Yeah, it is,” Zoro said. “Cold as balls, though.”

               “Is it? I hadn’t noticed,” Ace said. “But cold or not, you gotta admit this place has spirit.” As he said that, Zoro heard the familiar slosh of liquid and looked to see Ace holding a clear glass bottle that was unmistakably booze. Good booze, too. The kind where you couldn’t read the smudged label and probably couldn’t trust it even if you did. The kind of booze that peeled paint just by the fumes.

               “Wanna sip or two?”  Ace asked.

               “Sure.”

               “It’ll dry you out, you know,” Ace said, grin widening. “Could be dangerous in this place.”

               “I’ll risk it,” Zoro said with a matching grin. Ace laughed softly.

               “Oh, I like you.”

               They moved to settle on the ground, backs against the rock, legs stretched out over the sand. Zoro was sure to prop his swords up so sand wouldn’t creep in the sheaths. He’d inevitably find some anyway, probably. Damn sand got into everything. Ace twisted the cap off the bottle and took a long drink, the moonlight shining through the bottle and sending whorls of light across his moving throat. After a moment, Ace pulled his head back, letting out a long, satisfied breath before he handed the bottle over. Zoro tilted his head and chugged it back—and kept drinking even though his eyes watered a little as pure whiskey dropped cold fire right into his gut. He drank about as much as Ace had, a little less maybe, and pulled the bottle back, swallowing hard so he wouldn’t cough. Ace laughed again.

               “Damn strong, isn’t it?” he said, taking the bottle back and pointed at him around it. “Not the strongest I’ve had though. Listen, if a big Whitebeard guy named Jozu offers you a drink, make sure you test to see if it corrodes the floor or not before you  take a sip.” He grinned. “Only problem with being made of diamond is that it takes a lot to feel the kick.”

               “I’ll keep that in mind,” Zoro said and cleared his throat.  As strong as this stuff was, it didn’t take long for him to get used to it. The whiskey settled warm in his belly and he could tell it was good stuff by the way it smoldered in his stomach, crawling fingers warmth up his throat.  They’d drunk about half the bottle between them by the time the moon came over them directly, making everything seemed pale and washed out.

               “So, Shichibukai, eh?” Ace said, rolling the bottom edge of the bottle against the sand. Zoro watched it glint in the moonlight. “Typical for Luffy to try to eat the whole tiger before even trying the chicken.”

               “We’ve faced down a few tigers before,” Zoro said, folding his arms behind his head. Ace snorted.

               “In the East Blue? Cubs maybe—but not more than that.”

               “Yeah, you’re right.” After all, he knew the strength of the Shichibukai probably better than anyone on his crew. But her wasn’t really worried about this Crocodile guy. Sure , he’d be tough, but Luffy had decided to beat him so…

               “This your first warlord then?” Ace asked.

               “Second. We’ve met Mihawk already.”

               “And?”

               “Fought him.”

               “Wow. What did do to manage to piss _him_ off?”

               “Nothing.” Zoro grinned and took the bottle. “I challenged him”

               “No shit?” Ace said with a laugh. “You’re just as crazy as Luffy is! But you’re still alive. That’s even more surprising. I know you didn’t beat him, no offense, but it’s not like Mihawk to let challengers off so easily.”

               “He left me with a parting gift.”

               “Yeah? Let’s see.”

               Zoro shifted to pull off his robe and hike up his shirt, shivering a bit as the cold bit at his bare skin. Ace gave a low whistle.

               “That’s one hell of a parting gift,” he said, tracing his fingers along the scar. They were almost too hot against the cold and Zoro felt sweat bead between his shoulder blades and he swallowed.

               “That must have cut to the bone, too,” Ace said, taking the bottle back. “You’re pretty lucky to survive that.”

               “Nah. I have no plans on dying that easily.”

               “Obviously,” Ace said with a grin. He took a swig of the bottle and handed it back. Zoro drank a little more, absently watching the sky. Ace was leaning against, the wall, holding one leg against his chest. Zoro could see Ace watching him out of the corner of his eye, though he couldn’t guess why. A smile split the Whitebeard’s face.

               “So, wanna fuck?”

               What whiskey Zoro didn’t spray out he choked on and he did cough this time, leaning forward as Ace pounded him on the back.

               “Oh, sorry, did I surprise you?”

               “Yes, you surprised me!” Zoro wheezed, leveling a glare at the other pirate. “What the hell kind of question is that?”

               “Sorry, are you a virgin?”

               “No!”

               “Virgin with guys?”

               “No! And that’s not the point!”

               “Well I didn’t take you for a flowers and chocolates kind of guy…”

               “I’m not!”

               Ace blinked at him, clearly not understanding the problem. Geeze. He was as dense as Luffy. Who the hell thought that that was something you just sprung up on someone?!

               “You can’t just say those things so suddenly!”

               “Why not? It’s been a while for me, and knowing how hectic Luffy can be, it’s probably been a while for you, too.” A pause and Ace’s look shifted slightly. Something Zoro could feel rather than understand. 

               “Unless you’ve already got someone,” Ace said, though Zoro had the feeling that wasn’t what he was really asking. Zoro felt his face heat and rubbed the back of his neck. He had a feeling he was insulting the guy, but he wasn’t sure what the hell to do about it now. He was all out of sorts.

               “It’s not like I’m really opposed to that kind of thing,” he muttered, looking at the sand. “It was just a surprise.”

               “Well it’s up to you,” Ace said, taking the bottle from his limp fingers. Zoro couldn’t tell if he was satisfied with that answer or not. But at least now he had time to think. Shit. What the hell was he supposed to say to that? It was true it had been a while and—a fuck wasn’t –anything really that important. It was just fun… But generally the people he slept with he didn’t really know, and they sure as hell weren’t related to anyone in his crew.

                “You’re related to Luffy so…it’s a little weird…” But not that weird. And...what could be the harm in it, really? After all, Ace was right, he hadn’t gotten any lately and he probably wouldn’t get any for a while at least until this Crocodile guy was dealt with since most of his focus would go toward fighting and the rest recovering from fighting. There was no way sex would fit into the equation.               

                “But yeah sure…” He said, feeling his face getting even hotter. Ace said nothing. Had he decided against it? Had Zoro insulted him somehow? “Oi…” he said, glancing at the man and trailed off as he saw the snot bubble expanding out of his nose as he snored lightly.

                “Oi! Don’t just fall asleep!” Geeze this guy. What the hell? Zoro scrubbed his fingers through his hair. All that for nothing. He couldn’t exactly fault him for—just falling asleep outright at what had seemed like a rejection but still—after he’d built himself up to it and everything. Ace snorted.

                “Uh? What?” Ace said. He yawned and stretched, rubbing the back of his head and glanced at Zoro again. “Did you say yes?”

                “…Yes,” Zoro said, wondering just what the hell he was getting into.

                “Yosh!” Ace said with a wide grin and it was like the moon coming out from behind a cloud. He tilted his head back as he drank more and Zoro tried not to look at him too much because everything had—shifted suddenly and he couldn’t help but notice the way his lips fit around the glass rim. Okay. No. He wasn’t going to get stupid about this.

                But he wasn’t going to be afraid of it either.

He turned his head to watch Ace drink, noting the way he gripped the bottle and how his eyes were closed as if, for the moment, he was just focused on enjoying the liquor. That kind of single-mindedness was impressive and a little intense. Ace’s eyes opened and slid to meet his and Zoro jumped as something like embarrassment jolted through him, a flash of weird strangled heat that started at the center of his chest and jabbed straight downward. Ace dropped the bottle, licking a stray drop of booze away from the corner of his mouth and Zoro’s face blazed. D-damnit.

               “You rookies are so damn cute,” Ace said with a grin. Fuck that. He wasn’t cute. He was about to say as much when the older pirate leaned in suddenly and Zoro jerked back, cracking his skull against the rock. Didn’t hurt. Those stars would go away eventually, he was sure.

               “Not that.”

               “What, no kissing?” Ace said, seeming a little surprised.

               “No. It’s just a fuck, isn’t it?”

               “Yeah I guess so. If that’s what you want,” he said, the easy grin back. “Anything else?”

               “No marks that I’ll have to explain in the morning.” Because really he didn’t want to. There would be questions. There would be answers. He would never live it down and—he would somehow have to continue looking Luffy in the face.

                “You could just tell them to screw off,” Ace said, leaning in closer, breath warm against his jaw. Zoro swallowed, his heart pounding in his throat. He gave the older pirate a look. He said what he’d meant. Ace chuckled.

               “I’m just teasing. No marks.” And there was the liquid heat of tongue against his ear.

               “Ah-- “ Zoro covered his own mouth, his face on fire. Oh shit. Had a sound like that just come out of him?! No. Hell no. Fucks never sounded like that and this one wouldn’t either.

               “Looks like you’re getting excited,” Ace said with a laugh.

               “Shut up,” Zoro said, folding his arms and clenching his teeth. Okay. Sex. Just sex. Got it. Just had to prepare for it. No. Had to focus. Get in the right frame of mind. Ace was frowning at him. Zoro didn’t give a damn. He was trying to focus!

               Suddenly Ace slammed against his side, knocking him to the ground. Zoro cursed in surprise as his back slammed into the sand, hand scraped up as he had tried to grab onto the rock on the way. He slammed both hands into Ace’s shoulders instead.

               “Oi! What the hell!” Zoro snapped, gripping his shoulders to keep him away—to shove him off.

               “Hey, relax. You looked like you were getting worked up and I was trying to snap you out of it,” Ace said with a frown. “It’s not going to be fun for either of us if you’re tense.”

               Oh—right. That made sense. This would be easier if his face didn’t feel so damn red. Still, relax. He had to relax otherwise it would be as hard as fuck. And relaxing wasn’t so hard. It was just like meditation, right? He closed his eyes and focused—telling his wired senses to calm the hell down. He shifted his weight, feeling Ace shift in response. When he opened his eyes he saw the other pirate looking down at him, resting his chin on his fist and smiling. Not smirking. Not even grinning. Just smiling. Almost fondly.

               “I’m not fucking cute.”

               Ace laughed and waved a hand.

               “Sorry, sorry. Now, let’s see. No kissing or marks, eh? Tall order…” His hand slid hot against Zoro’s stomach, under his shirt, callused against his skin. Zoro sucked in a breath and let it out as Ace’s rough lips pressed against the side of his neck, sending a prickle of sensation through him.

               “Fortunately, I’m just that good,” Ace said, those lips moving down, a gust of hot breath accompanying it and the hand sliding up. Ngh. Why was his hand so damn hot? Zoro shifted again, flushing as he realized he was getting hard just from this.

               “Oh! By the way,” Ace said, lifting his head. Zoro blinked at the sudden shift in tone.  “You’re going to claw at my back, just watch where your hands are.”

               “Don’t get ahead of yourself,” Zoro muttered. He was far from a virgin after all and it didn’t matter how hot Ace wa— Firefist’s face was suddenly centimeters above his own and Zoro could feel his breath spill across his face as the soft tendrils of his hair fell against Zoro’s forehead. But he could hardly focus on either as those damn eyes stared into him. Dark as hell. Determined as hell.

               “I said you’re going to claw at my back. Just watch your hands, aye?”

               Zoro could only nod. Ace dipped his head and Zoro opened his mouth without thinking. Ace chuckled deep in his chest and Zoro cursed. He was losing his damn mind. It was the heat. Had to be. Fire-fist didn’t complete the movement and instead moved his mouth back to Zoro’s neck, his hand clawing down his side just under his ribs, leaving trails of soft bright pain. He wanted to arch against it but he refused. Just. Fucking refused.  That mouth reached his collarbone and he ground his teeth at the burst of tongue and then—

               “Ah!” A hard sharp bite made his hips jerk and his cock twitch against the cloth of his boxers. He ground his teeth. That was going to leave a mark. “Damnit. You—“

               “You’re only going to have to explain that one if you go without a shirt, right?” Ace said against his skin. “Don’t worry, I’ve got it handled.”

               Yeah. That was true.  Anyway it was hard to think as Ace was pushing his shirt up and attacking his chest with small infuriating bites followed by that damn tongue that burned against his skin. He pressed the back of his hand to his mouth and squeezed his eyes shut, trying to keep the sounds inside. It wasn’t easy. Especially as the clawed hand reached his hip and Ace _bit_ at the scar sending a stab of heated pain through him that tangled straight into his cock. His toes curled in the heated confines of his boots and he fought back the strangled noise that came out of his throat.

               “Sorry did that hurt?” Ace said, though didn’t sound sorry at all. “I’ll make it better.”

               And the hand on his hip found his cock. Ahh shit. Zoro twisted his head back, fighting back the moan and ended up gasping anyway as Ace’s fingers gripped him, surrounding him with heat and too soft cloth and he couldn’t help but roll helplessly into it as Ace worked it, tightening, loosening, his whole world pinpointed on that hand and he dug his fingers into the sand, trying to keep some kind of control.

               “God, you’re so ready,” Ace murmured, sending his blood boiling, but also sending heat into his face. How could he give in so damn easily?

               “Shut up,” he said in a shaky breath.

               “No…there’s nothing wrong with it, look.” Ace’s hand left and Zoro almost reached for it to bring it back, but it was replaced by Ace’s hips, grinding against his, a similar hardness pressing against his. Ah it felt so damn good. Searing heat whenever it touched. Zoro ground back against him, meeting him, pressing up.

               “Hnn.” The sound that left Ace’s mouth only encouraged Zoro to press up against him again, harder.

               “I was—“ Ace said, hands resting on either side of Zoro as he bowed his head. “—ready ng all ni-night.”

               Yes, those noises. Zoro was panting by now but he didn’t care, he gripped Ace’s hips to hold him down and rolled against him, clenching his teeth as the sensation sent white heat through him. Almost painful but too good. Too much. He ground against him again and again and Ace met him, arms shaking, but still talking.

               “I was hah going to take care of it myself but oh fuck glad you came along.”

               “Yeah? Glad I did too,” Zoro said, picking up his pace, starting a jagged rhythm against him, moving faster but still making sure to brush right into him, jolting himself and making Ace match him, slamming down against him. Zoro watched his fingers curl into the sand and something like snarl worked in the other man’s throat. Zoro _grinned_.

               “No, damn brat,” Ace said, voice dark as he grabbed Zoro’s wrists with surprising strength and forced his hands away and back into the sand. “I’m not going to let you get your way.”

               “No?” Zoro said. Just because his hands were gone didn’t mean he needed them. He continued to thrust against him, only just keeping himself from a white hot peak.

               “No,” Ace snarled and kissed him. Zoro jerked in surprise, his mouth opening and that hot tongue sliding right in, thrusting against his. Fucking cheat. Still as long as it was there. Zoro tangled his hand in Ace’s hair to keep him there, distract him—only to get distracted himself as Ace’s hand dove into his pants and wrapped around his cock. The skin on skin wrapped through him and he moaned against Ace’s mouth, jerking at the superheated hand that worked him. Ah. So fucking hot. He rolled up against it, desperately, wanting it. Wanting it so fucking bad.

               “Not yet,” Ace said, gripping the base of his cock hard enough that it almost hurt. Zoro glared at him, hissing raggedly between his teeth. If this bastard squeezed any harder than that... Ace met his glare, his eyes tight and dark but Zoro didn’t give a fuck. That _hurt_. Ace’s expression softened and he smiled a little.

               “Not yet,” he said in a softer tone. “Hold it in a little for me, okay?”

               “Hurry it up then,” Zoro snapped, propping himself up on his elbows as he watched Ace shift to his knees and shivering as the older man worked his pants down so that cold air brushed against his legs. It was cold all over without him and he could feel the sand gritty and shifting under him. Then Ace undid his own belt, dropping it onto the sand before unzipping his shorts and working himself out. His cock was long and proud and red tipped. Zoro reached for it but Ace glanced at him, a hot quick look and Zoro hesitated before pulling his hand back.

               “Sorry,” Ace said. Zoro shrugged.

               “It’s nothing.”

               Ace gave him another small smile and dug into one of his pockets, pulling out a small vial full of a clear liquid. Zoro snorted.

               “What, you carry that around with you just in case?”

               Ace grinned. “Of course I do, mate. On the open sea, you don’t know when you’ll get a chance. So it’s always best to be prepared.”

               Zoro watched Ace douse his fingers in that oil and then slick over his cock. Zoro’s own twitched at the sight and he reached down to work himself softly to keep it warm. Keep it hard. Ace smirked and ran those slick hot fingers over Zoro’s balls which made him want to move closer and further and closer at the same time. A single finger slipped inside him.

               “Oi,” Zoro said. “I don’t need that.”

               “Oh?” Ace blinked at him. “Are you sure?”

               “Yeah.”

               “You really are a tough bastard,” Ace said with a grin. “Okay, then, Zoro;  knock knock I’m coming in.”

               Zoro stared at him.

               “That was dumb as hell…” though the last part was breathed out as Ace pressed against him and inside him, slowly filling him up. “Hng…” he shifted a leg over Ace’s back to make it easier nudging up to meet him.

               “Yeah, I guess it was,” Ace said with a tight breathy laugh. Well as long as he knew it. Zoro focused a moment, concentrating on getting the fit just right and getting used to it, tightening around him and hearing Ace’s desperate reaction.

               “Okay, we’re good,” Zoro said, grinning harder at the Whitebeard’s moaning sort of sigh as he moved inside him. Zoro twisted his head back and moved back against him, jerking himself, trying to find the rhythm. Ace brushed his hand away.

               “I can get that, mate.”

               “You sure?  Ah…” Apparently he was because the warm slick hand was now around him again. Zoro clenched his teeth and gripped the ground to try and prevent himself from flying apart. He raised his hands and gripped Ace instead, grabbing at his shoulder blades but making sure he avoided the tattoo that slid across his back. He tightened his grip as Ace began to pick up pace, moving his hand in the same hard rhythm. Ah… this was good. So good. He felt like he was going to die but—ha—he wasn’t clawing Ace’s back, just holding on. He r—refused. Just f-fucking— Hahh.

               Ace slowed a little, stopped and shifted, letting him go to guide one of Zoro’s legs higher around him and gripped him again, hot and slick, and Zoro knew some of that slickness was from himself. Ace’s head rested by his ear and Zoro could hear his harsh ragged breathing, but he wasn’t moving, not even his hand. Before Zoro could say anything, though, Ace’s voice dripped hot and dark into his ear.

                “I like the way your earrings chime when I fuck you.”

                Zoro’s eyes widened and then Ace _drove_ into him, hitting that one spot that sent pure white heat snapping through him.

                “AH _FUCK!_ ” The sound from his own throat rang against the rock and Ace didn’t stop, only picked up his pace, going harder and harder, hitting that one spot that set every nerve in Zoro’s body on fire, his earrings clinking in time, right into his ear, right at Ace’s pace.  Zoro snarled and buried his teeth into Ace’s neck . Ace made a noise like a strangled laugh and his hand started going at a frantic electric pace against Zoro, even faster than he was pressing into him. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck Zoro could only squeeze his eyes shut and hang on, fingers digging into Ace’s back as the sounds slid from his throat.

               Tighter and tighter everything wound to that same sharp peak, in his gut, in his hands, every part of him. He felt a blister of heat and squinted one eye open to see that the hand that Ace had braced against the sand was on fire, wild and bright and racing up his arm. But then Ace hit into him again, hard and fast and desperate and Zoro couldn’t think of anything until the heat took him over completely and he came in a sharp burst of light behind his eyes, voice muffled by Ace’s neck.

               It was dark. Really damn dark. Zoro’s eyes were closed, arms flopped on the sand, one knuckle resting against the lacquered sheath of a sword. _Wado_. He could feel it. Ace had stopped moving and was heavy on him. Zoro was breathing so hard he couldn’t even tell if Ace was breathing or not. Well once he found the strength to move, he would check. For the moment, Zoro closed his eyes

               --only to snap them open again as a sleepy voice from the not so distant what the fuck was he thinking camp said:

               “Zoro?”

               Usopp. Shit. Shit. _Shit_. No way was he going to be caught here like this by anyone let alone Usopp. It would be all over the ship. No, it would be all over the ship in as many variations as his twisted mind could think of and every port and—no. No fuck no.

               “O..oi,” he hissed. Ace snored back at him. That—That son of a bitch! That son of a bitch, Zoro was going to kill him if he got caught! “Wake up! Wake up, you ass!”

               “Zoroo!” Usopp called. “Geeze did you wander off somewhere? We’ll never find you out here.”

               Crap. Yes. _Keep being stupid for just a little while, Usopp,_ Zoro thought as he bodily shoved Ace off of him and dashed to the other side of the rock, leaning against it. Now he could go back to camp and…

               Without pants…

               Shit, how could he have forgotten his pants?! There is no way Usopp wouldn’t notice something like that! What the hell did he ever do to deserve karma like this?! He heard footsteps coming closer and Usopp called his name again.

               “Morning, kid,” Ace said and Zoro was both glad and pissed to hear his voice. That was until something flopped on his head and he realized it was his pants. Relief swept over him and he went to put them on and realized with a twitch that he still had his boots on. How the _hell_ had Ace even—

               “G’morning,” Usopp said, yawning, too close now.  Fuck it. Who cared. Zoro frantically tugged of his boots while standing, trying not to fall over.

               “Sleep well?” Ace asked.

               “Pretty well. I’m used to sleeping in the desert, you know. It all comes from my childhood as a nomad across the East Blue wastes.”

               “Is that right?” Ace said, sounding amused. Zoro rolled his eyes and yanked off the other boot. 

               “Yeah, it’s a long wonderful story. I’ll tell you how I rescued a princess—it’s great stuff…. Ah, except that I need to find Zoro first. Have you seen him?”

               “I think he went to take a piss.”

               “Great. The way he gets lost he’ll probably be back Whiskey Peak by the time we find him,” Usopp said. Ace laughed.

               “Oi!” Zoro snapped, then could have slapped himself. Idiot. Idiot. He had just yanked up his pants when Usopp came around the rock to peer at him.

               “Oh, there you are. I’ve come to relieve you of watch,” Usopp said, then blinked at him. “Is there a reason your shoes are off? Did you get bit by a scorpion or something?” Usopp sighed and shook his head, whishing his hand through the air as if Zoro was the biggest idiot in existence. “That kind of thing only works on jelly fish stings and bugbear spiders.”

               Ace was laughing loud enough to wake up half the desert. Zoro glowered at Usopp and grabbed his boots, stalking past him and went around the rock to shoot a glare at that damn Fire-fist who didn’t look the least bit apologetic. He stopped laughing, though and grinned, holding out Zoro’s robe. Zoro snatched it and tugged it back on, grabbing his swords as well, blushing as his earrings chimed. Ace made a noise that sounded like a laugh but when Zoro glared at him, he was looking away.

               Grumbling to himself, Zoro started back toward the camp and his blanket to sleep and wonder what the hell was happening to his life.

               “Hey, Zoro,” Ace called and Zoro stopped and looked over his shoulder at him. “We should drink again sometime.”

               “Yeah sure,” Zoro said, because how could he say anything else? He smirked. “But if you want to, you have to come find me.”

               “You got it, bro,” Ace said, saluting and winking to go along with it. Zoro shook his head and moved at an easier pace back to his blanket.

               “You were drinking?” Usopp asked. “I’m a champion drinker!”

               “Really? Too bad I’m completely tapped out, mate,” Ace said. “But tell me about your princess.”

               “Well—“

               Zoro shook his head, rolled out his bedroll and crawled in. He was asleep before his head hit the pillow.

\---

                There was a shoe on his shoulder, nudging him. Ugh it was too early for waking up. He didn’t want to, damnit. He was tired. And anyway, though he was fairly used to being woken up by some asshole’s foot, this wasn’t his foot but Usopp’s and he knew it was Usopp because he could smell the tobasco and gunpowder.

                “Oi, oi, dumbass Marimo,” Usopp said in a gruff voice. “Get up and eat your shitty breakfast before I do.”

                Could he send him flying? Should he send him flying? Probably not. But for a moment he was sorely tempted. The sound of slow clapping came in the distance.

                “Nice job, tough guy,” Sanji said. “Now come help me pack up the breakfast stuff.”

                “Sure be right there.  Ah, but seriously, Zoro, you better eat it because Luffy just looked this way.”

                Ah, shit.

                Zoro sat up, grabbed his breakfast bowl in one hand and Luffy’s rubbery stretched out arm in the other and _pulled_ using the momentum of his captain’s own damn gum gum to send him flying in the opposite direction. Luffy made a mad desperate swipe as he passed over but only managed to grab Zoro’s chopsticks before crashing into the sand at some fair distance and rolling to a stop.

                “How the hell can you guys be so lively this time in the morning,” Nami grumbled. Who the hell was lively? This was a matter of life and death and she knew it. He lifted the bowl to his mouth and ate quickly before Luffy could recover.

                “Should I kick their annoying asses, Nami-san?” Sanji asked. Zoro could comment to that but he wasn’t ready to get into it right now.

                “No thank you, Sanji-kun. But if you could pack up our tent?”

                “Right away!”

                “Hey, why am I packing this stuff up by myself now?” Usopp said.

                “Want me to help, Usopp-san?” Vivi asked.

                “Don’t worry about it,” Nami said brightly. “He doesn’t mind.”

                “Oi, you don’t get to decide that,” Usopp said but Vivi only chuckled.

                “Get your lazy ass up and help, shitty marimo-chan,” Sanji said. If Zoro didn’t feel like hell he’d definitely go kick his ass for that. As it happened, however… He finished his food just as Luffy reached for it again and let him take it.

                “Ah! Zoro, you bastard! You ate it all!” Luffy yelled.

                “It was _my_ breakfast, you damn walking stomach!” Zoro snapped back. “Lick the bowl if you’re that hungry!”

                “I already did,” Luffy said, pouting at him over the rim of the bowl. Zoro shook his head and rolled to his feet only to wince.  Damn his ass hurt.

                His ass hurt.

                Because he’d just got fucked in it.

                _Without even raising any opposition_.

                How the _hell_ did that even happen?! He should have at least said _something_!

                “Good morning, Zoro,” Ace said, with the biggest shit-eating grin Zoro had ever seen. Zoro had just slept with him. Been fucked by him. Somehow. What the hell had even happened to his life?

                “Bushido-san are you—are you all right?” Vivi said, covering her mouth, her eyes unusually bright. No. He was not. Not at all.

                “Did you really get stung by a scorpion, Zoro?” Usopp asked. “That can be really bad!”

                Oh. He was tempted. He was so tempted.

                “Eh?” Chopper said, struggling to sit up, already dazed by the rising heat. “Sc-scorpion bite?”

                “No, I wasn’t stung by a scorpion,” he said, rolling up his bed roll and ignoring the pain raidiating from his lower body. It would go away soon enough.

                “I can attest to that,” Ace said and Zoro wondered what Luffy would do if he skewered him right here and now.

                “But then why were you peeing on your feet?” Usopp asked.

                “DON’T GO BELIEVEING YOUR OWN STORIES!” Zoro snapped at him.

                “Zoro was peeing on his feet?” Luffy asked, coming to Zoro’s elbow and looking up at him. “Were you asleep or something?”

                “No, he’s just that dumb,” Sanji said carelessly. Three swords. Three nakamakabobs.

                “Nah, we just got drunk and had a rock climbing contest and he fell off,” Ace said, clapping a hand on his back.

                “Still an idiot,” Sanji said blandly and Vivi giggled while Nami just looked at them with an annoyed expression. Vivi nudged her and Nami surprisingly grinned and waved her off which just made Vivi giggle more. Zoro shook his head. Women.

                Ah well. He went around gathering various bits of things that hadn’t been packed and rubbing the back of his neck which was already beading with sweat from the rising heat of the day. It hadn’t been so bad and it wasn’t like he regretted it.

                “Hey, Ace, what’s that?” Luffy said.

                “What? Oh…”

                “It looks you got bit.”

                Zoro froze. Oh shit. That had happened.

                “Yeah. Well I was wrestling with a rock tiger cub and it got a little out of control,” Ace said. He was a better liar than Usopp and Zoro kept working, wondering if he ignored them, they would all go away.

                “Re…really,” Vivi said between giggles.

                “Uh huh,” Nami said. “Well next time, tell that rock tiger cub to keep it down.”

                It took until evening for Zoro to get it.

 

**Author's Note:**

> For CCles


End file.
